Irrational

It feels like vomit

Surging in my stomach

Climbing up my throat

But it's not

It's just my friend

Anxiety

Oh no

I had an encounter

With unpleasant things

Time to hide

Panic

Run and cry

It itches

And scratches

At my skin and bones

The headache is coming

That's the way it goes

Why am I like this

How will this end

I reach for that glass

Beside my bed

Fill it with liquor

And just try to relax

I'm drowning in my fears again

Screaming won't help

Alleviate this pain

Only the amber liquid

Swimming through my veins

Stop this

Stop this

Stop this monster

That chokes me and holds me down

It takes my energy away

So I lie here and wait

For this episode to end

Why does this happen

What purpose does this have

My brain creates these irrational fears

That clearly I deserve

It feels like vomit

Spilling from my mouth

Why did I even bother

Leaving my house

Stop this

Leave me

I'll be fine

I guess

Written by Zara. P, September 8, 2017