It Hurts

It feels like it's crawling

Up my chest

Into my head

Through my veins 

Squeezing my lungs

Until I suffocate 

It hurts

But I can't run anymore

Dare I try to hide?

Can I?

Should I? 

Or will this destroy me in the end

This parasite inside of my head

It eats away the best parts of me

Until I'm better off dead

It hurts

So I must still be here

But for how long

Before I'm dragged back into the muck

Inside of my head 

I live like a prisoner 

Chained to the feelings I must endure day after day

Destroying the truest parts of me

Leaving something hollow instead

It hurts 

Yet I remain

I continue on

Through this desolate place

Inside of my head

As it crawls through my chest

And into my veins

Burning my flesh

Consuming me 

All of me

It hurts

So my eyes fill with liquid shame

The kind of fear that everyone can see

And no one can help keep away

As it passes you begin to see

The person I become

The thing

That becomes

Whatever is left of me 

Can't breathe

This isn't right 

I'm hurting again 

From a panic no one can see

A dread no one else can touch

This feeling welling up inside

That finds its way out 

At random times

Am I to blame? 

It still hurts

Written by Zara P. March 28, 2017